It was meant to get the nation back in shape in the comfort of our own homes - but women working out on the Nintendo Wii Fit video game have helped cause £20 million of damage to their living rooms.
Flower pots, television sets and even pets have been sent flying by the high kicks and hula hoop motions of increasingly vigorous home exercise routines, a study found.
Pets is right. Polly is fascinated by the thing, and likes to try to get in the way if at all possible. You're spending a lot of time cavorting around with that electronic board, I must investigate it further. What are you doing sitting up and down again repeatedly? I'll probably get a better view of it if I walk behind your back as you sit up and... hey, I'm standing here! Why would you lean back on me! Do you mind if I walk on the board while you're trying to balance precisely? Hey, this Wii nunchuck thing you've just put on the table temporarily has a delicious-looking cord, mind if I steal it?
In other news, the Wii Fit program can't distinguish between weight gained by virtue of actually building up muscle, or by eating too much. If you put on a few hundred grams it asks you why, and "I've been doing these exercises and I think they're actually working by building muscle mass" is not one of the options. The available selections are all variations on "I... gutsed a packet of Violet Crumbles, sorry". And each time you answer the only non- food related answer, "I don't know", it suspiciously asks you if you REALLY don't know. Have you ever had an animated white rectangle raise an eyebrow at you? And it doesn't even have eyebrows!
The anthropomorphic board is a rude little bugger, actually. And not just on actual fitness issues. Not satisfied with nagging me to brush my teeth, it even started dispensing romantic advice the other day, telling me that if I wanted to keep my relationship with my lass strong, then "eye contact is very important". Gee, thanks, you patronising jumped up set of bathroom scales. There, I said it. (I wouldn't put it past the creepy thing to sulk, now.)