Monopoly, an irritating dice-fest that leaves such a bad taste in people's mouths such that once they pass the age of 12 and realise how fundamentally broken it is they never want to look at another board game again (thus missing out on the many brilliant board games that have subsequently been released), has by now spawned dozens of themed editions - none of which make it any more worth your time. It's still a game in which initial dice-throws make or break your chances*, in which the optimal move on any particular turn (if there's even a choice) is always obvious, and which always results in a long, drawn-out end-game between two players that can only end if one of them happens to get a couple of hits in quick succession**. Down, of course, to the dice. Obviously, the only way to win Monopoly is to NEVER FREAKING BRING THE SET OUT.
In fact, the continued, mystifying sales success of Monopoly (based apparently entirely on parents forgetting in the twenty years between abandoning it and having their own kids how much they really hated it just long enough to foolishly buy another copy) is one of the strongest counter-examples against the notion that the market knows what the hell it's doing. Good products will prosper, and poor ones will die out, eh? I wish. Just what percentage of the planet's resources have now been consumed in the Cycle of Monopoly Sets?
Fear my 1337 MS Paint skillz. (Or, at least, dread them.)
So my message to Hasbro is this: don't include Jerusalem. Don't include Gaza. (The only reason the Palestinians want in on the game is that they haven't ever played it.) Don't include any of the cities you're contemplating including. Have mercy on the world and STOP SPENDING MONEY PROMOTING THE WORLD'S SHITTEST GAME. Please.
* There is one way to overcome that issue, which is to make every property sale an auction no matter who landed on it. Everyone has a shot: the property will go to the person who is prepared to allocate more of their limited money-supply to it. This makes the opening of the game much more interesting, and gives everyone a chance to at least snag themselves one set - although you still have the tedious end-game.
** The only sensible way to deal with the end-game problem is to play the game as follows: when someone goes bankrupt, the person with the most money/property left in the game wins. Immediately.
