The idea? To get hardcore religious fundamentalists, convinced that they're going to disappear and be sent to heaven when the Rapture inevitable occurs, to pay money NOW in order to be able to send a message to their heathen loved ones once they go. Look at the value-for-money options - $5 for a standard message, $10 for one "printed on resume quality paper"(!), and $800 for:
Our flagship model. Your message of up to 3,000 characters is hand-scribed on medieval style parchment sheets, and then rolled and wrapped with a fine Italian ribbon. The Class III message is delivered immediately after the Rapture, so expect delivery in as little as one day, depending on the transportation options available to those rejected from the Kingdom of God.
Ooh, classy.
But the funniest part is the FAQ:
- Why Should We Trust You to Deliver Our Messages?
Although we are not religious, we believe that a man's word is his bond. We consider ourselves to have an obligation to each and every customer, to deliver their mail in a timely and respectful manner. During the Great Tribulation, during which sinners left on Earth will have one last chance to accept Jesus as the Lord and Savior, our very souls will depend on our following through with the deliveries. Surely God would not accept a betrayer into his Home.- How Do We Know that You Will Not Ascend To Heaven with Us?
The Bible says that only those that repent of their sins and accept Jesus as the True Son of God will be saved. We do neither. Some of our personal sins include: drunkenness, heresy, sacrilige (sic)/blasphemy, gluttony, laciviousness (sic), and sloth. There is no way we are going to disappear into Heaven any time soon.- Can I Write a Letter to [insert name here]?
You can write a letter to anyone you choose! After the Rapture the world will be a different place, with millions of people disappearing overnight. Friends, relatives, and celebrities are all popular choices. It may not be worth it to write to George W. Bush or his administration, as it is clear that he will be one of the first to go to Heaven when Jesus comes to tend to his flock.- Aren't You Afraid of God's Wrath?
We don't believe in God, remember? In the event that the Rapture actually occurs, we will go to Plan B: "Lifetime of Sin Followed by Deathbed Repentance."
For scam artists, I like their style. And anyone who doesn't get how much of a piss-take this is after the George Bush remark deserves to be sharing their hard-earned around, anyway.
(Link courtesy of Saint.)
